BEST BACKGROUND MUSIC EVER

This is a good album for working on the computer, or house cleaning, or what have you.

It’s actually 4 albums put together. (Go here for more info.)

I have read reviews of Gas albums that say it sounds like there’s a party happening next door, and you can hear dance music thumping through the wall. You weren’t invited to the party (this one review read) but you don’t really mind, because the music sounds soothing in some bizarre way.

The review I read (possibly from the Wikipedia page linked to above) made a similar comparison to that one, at least. đŸ™‚

My short review of Gas in general is that it comes at your ears like a cloud of pulsating noise, but if you listen long enough — and in the right way, sort of like an aural magic eye (magic ear?), in like a half-paying attention, half-ignoring sort of way; talking like a few minutes here — details start to emerge from the cloud, rhythmic bits of fuzz that may or may not have once been a recording of a violin or something start to creep out, and anyways if you’re looking for something semi-relaxing to help you tune out the world while you work on a computer (or whatever), Gas is something you should check out.

RONA

WORLD HEALTH ORGANIZATION: “Hey everybody there is a virus. It is very contagious. People catch it by inhaling droplets that come out of infected people’s mouths when they cough, speak, or even breathe. Which means, if everybody wears a mask, fewer people will catch the virus. We may have forgotten to mention that this virus can kill you. Did we mention it can kill you? It can kill you. Like, fast. So wear a mask, please!”

AMERICA: “[blares country music at top volume from open window of pickup truck]”

REST OF THE WORLD: “Oh wow, this is bad. And I bet older people and people with pre-existing conditions are at an even higher risk.”

WORLD HEALTH ORGANIZATION: “That’s correct.”

REST OF THE WORLD: “Wow. So I guess it’s, like, inconvenient? But I mean we should wear masks anyway, because people could die?”

AMERICA: “[runs stop light at intersection, flings half-empty longneck Busch Light bottle out of the window, which hits a post and shatters]”

WORLD HEALTH ORGANIZATION: “[covers face to protect eyes from shattered glass] What the fuck?”

AMERICA: “[slams on brakes, slides to a stop]”

WORLD HEALTH ORGANIZATION: “Oh for the love of fuck what now?”

REST OF THE WORLD: “Shh just act like the glass didn’t hit you.”

WORLD HEALTH ORGANIZATION: “What are you– no! Hell no! America can’t just fling their fuckin’ Busch Light bottles all over the goddamn place–”

AMERICA: “[steps out of the pickup truck]”

REST OF THE WORLD: “oh shit oh fuck oh man oh fuck…”

WORLD HEALTH ORGANIZATION: “Well at least he doesn’t have a gun this time.”

AMERICA: “[Reaches behind seat, retrieves shotgun]”

REST OF THE WORLD: “oh FUCK oh SHIT why does he have that shotgun? Jesus Christ…”

WORLD HEALTH ORGANIZATION: “Don’t worry about what that lunatic does. [Puts on mask] Just put on a mask before he gets over here and starts spraying droplets of saliva everywhere.”

REST OF THE WORLD: “[Puts on mask] But don’t the masks protect others from us more than they protect us from others?”

AMERICA: “[kills engine, turns off radio]”

WORLD HEALTH ORGANIZATION: “Yes, but some protection is better than no protection.”

AMERICA: “You say something to me? Mr. High-and-mighty World Health Organization, with your fancy doctor book learning and your leftist socialismist ideology. Can’t be trusted.”

WORLD HEALTH ORGANIZATION: “Come again?”

AMERICA: “Oh I bet you’d like that, wouldn’t you? You socialists are all the same. [spits tobacco juice on the pavement] Buncha communists and perverts.”

REST OF THE WORLD: “That doesn’t even make any sense.”

AMERICA: “What did you say to me? I heard you over there saying something, but I couldn’t make out what it was, because you got that fuckin’ mask on, like a little fuckin’ kid at fuckin’ Halloween. [shucks shotgun]”

REST OF THE WORLD: “[glares at America]”

AMERICA: “That’s what I thought. You little piece of shit, over there talking shit, and you can’t even back up your shit.”

WORLD HEALTH ORGANIZATION: “Now hold on just a minute–”

AMERICA: “Oh here we go! You gone tell me I gotta wear a mask, Mr. Doctor man?”

WORLD HEALTH ORGANIZATION: “That would certainly help the situation, America.”

AMERICA: “Well guess what, Mr. Doctor Man, where I come from, is a place called America. And we got, we got something in that country ain’t no other country got, and that’s freedom.”

REST OF THE WORLD: “(muttering) yeah ok but you also have the highest incarceration rate in the world.”

AMERICA: “[points shotgun at Rest Of The World] WHUT DID YOU SAY TO ME?”

REST OF THE WORLD: “I said, I like America, America is #1!”

AMERICA: “[lowers shotgun] Well, I guess a broken clock is right once a day. Twice a day. At midnight? But then if it was noon…”

WORLD HEALTH ORGANIZATION: “(whispering) look let’s just get the fuck out of here before he remembers he was pissed off.”

REST OF THE WORLD: “[nods]”

AMERICA: “…and we got a bunch of amendments to that constitution, and one of em says I can shoot this here gun at whoever I don’t like, and if you got a problem with that then you got a problem with freedom. And I ain’t talking bout what these self-proclaimed [coughs], these self-proclaimed Feminazis and Socialists is [coughs] tryin to ram down my [coughs] ram down my [coughs, hacks] throat, and they ain’t no more American than they is [coughs, sputters], than they is [hacks, coughs, hacks, sputters, drops shotgun, keels over]”